Just "eff" it and enjoy it

Often times in the natural hair world there are certain "rules" to follow:

Rule #1: Your hair MUST BE in protective styles 99.9% of the time
Rule #2: You MUST EMBRACE your natural curl pattern (or lack of it)
Rule #3: You must NEVER EVER straighten your hair or you will be deemed a sell out
Rule #4: You MUST avoid certain products (Ex. Mineral oil, sulfates & silicones to name a few)

I may be exaggerating some of these "rules", however I have recently noticed that there are a lot of unspoken rules in the natural hair community.  While rules are awesome guidelines and markers to help us along - THEY ARE NOT LAW!  So I say - Just "EFF" IT!  Forget the rules sometimes and ENJOY your hair.

When I first went natural, a big part of it included me enjoying my hair.  That's right - just loving it, embracing it and being ecstatic about it.  After my BC in 2006, I NEVER deep conditioned my hair, I used ZERO oils and any store-bought product, and I ALWAYS wore my hair out.  I also NEVER trimmed it.  Guess what - it still grew at the same rate that my hair grows now.  Granted, I didn't know what I was doing, however, I also wasn't concerned about it (I don't recall having any major breakage).  You know the term, "absence makes the heart grow fonder"?  Well, I think absence may make the hair grow longer.  LOL, maybe not in every case, but I definitely think it's good to just let go, and let your hair do what you and it wants to do.

For example, if you love your hair in an afro, and it's easy for you to maintain - wear an afro.  Or, if you like your hair to curl a certain way, and don't mind spending 2 hours and 1 tub of eco-styler to get it to look that way - do it!  I write this post not to encourage people to ignore proven techniques in growing our afro-textured hair.  I write this post to remind ourselves that our hair should be fun.  It should be enjoyable, and if the previous statements hold true, it will always be beautiful.


  1. I love my blown out fro! and wigs and weaves!

    Thanks for this post Mo. So many folks are caught up in protective styles not realizing a lot of them are not the bomb.com when it comes to looks for all people. Especially me with naturally thin hair; tucking in the ends just makes it look like I'm bald when I have a head full of beautiful hair :)

  2. I agree with this post. I do think people have to set their own hair goals and as boring as it sounds hair is individual so we each need to learn what our hair can and cannot do.

    I learned that my hair does not like heat or too much stretching. I also learned that trimming is great fro keeping knots at bay (I know you leave yours alone but I can't, they bug me to death). I come from the school of lazy so keeping my hair braided is easy peasy.

    I feel that there are good hair practices but in truth hair can take a lot of punishment too. Hair is a fantastic way of expressing yourself and obsessing over length (which is what many naturals do) does hinder this.

    So all in all as you said, enjoy your hair, your way! I love my fuzz halo braids but I don't think my way is for everyone.

  3. How ironic...


  4. @ Jazz - I know, I'm glad I posted my thoughts or else I might be looking like a copycat, but I promise those were my original thoughts...

  5. Preach Pastor! Let me tell you, I am LOVING my long flowing locs at this moment! Now, this press will be dead and gone soon cause it's severely impacting my workout ability which is unacceptable, but I'm loving it none the less. Sometimes natural nazis get so caught up in how we're supposed to act, what we're supposed to do, etc. that they forget that hair is an accessory and should be treated accordingly.

    And anyways, the point of my embracing my natural hair was to 1. not waste money at a salon during the treacherous DC summers, and 2. see how long my hair could grow. What's the point of doing a length check if you're never going to actually wear it stretched out like that?? #Foolish

    So all that to say, I'm enjoying it! :)